Things move fast, every day there’s 239873424 things filling your to do list, hijacking your focus and pulling you in all different directions.
This world of productivity first is A LOT… Whatever’s consuming your time and energy – kids, work, sick parents, business, uni.. it’s always the same… life seems to be FULL and slowing down seems unreachable…. something you’ll get to when you have the time, right?!
I hear you.
If you’re the eldest daughter you’ve probably also spent your most of your existence thinking you can do it all, and even better… you can do it alone! (Yeah – how’s that adult ADHD diagnosis going?)
It’s fkn hectic out here! Only in the last couple of years since buying the studio have I discovered that, in fact, much to my ego’s disapproval – I cannot do it all alone!
I, as we all do, need the support of others. And for a while it killed me to ask for help, for assistance, to break down in front of my girls. I felt like a failure and it’s still something I work through daily. Luckily, I’m surrounded by incredible women who WANT to be a part of what I’m creating, this magic that is coming to life at Gold. My friends, my sister, the network of love and support that moves around me constantly is the sole reason this studio and its community exist. For which I’m eternally grateful!
But after this week away, spent with absolute strangers who owe me nothing and have no connection to this business I discovered an entirely new world.
The power of co regulation among women.
Yes, at home we cuddle, vent, talk, listen, laugh and dance but when it’s with women you already know and love the safety is already there.
With strangers it’s all new, fresh, nerve wracking… you’ve got to build the trust. And what better way than a week of magic.
A week of holding space for heavy stories, of sinking into safety within your body (both clothed and naked), of massage, cuddles, falling asleep on each other, holding hands and stroking each other’s hair, of movement, of stillness, of taking the time to witness each other, of sending prayers and wishes for each other’s lives… with absolute strangers.
In this week, I quickly noticed how the pain in my body disappeared. My injured shoulder stopped aching, the inflammation in my knee disappeared, the need to release the stiff crack in my neck 5 times a day…. all gone.
One of the girls said her sciatica had completely gone – she put it down to the morning yoga sessions… and there would be some truth to that!
But within 3-4 days… for all aches and pains to disappear?
And yes, we weren’t working on computers or dealing with daily stressors – that helps!
But we were co regulating!!
Every single day, within the group (of 12) we connected deeply with each other and space to tune into our bodies… what did we NEED in that moment… what did we WANT in that moment…. and we had time to listen to our bodies.
Together, as a little tribe of women.
Research has shown that coregulation is essential for adults just as much as little ones. The simple act of being a calm, grounded person for another, just holding space without attempting to fix anything or offer advice is enough for someone to coregulate…. but physical touch with real cuddles where you have time to melt, breath together and stop the wild thoughts…. those are the magic moments.
